10 Best Quotes In HBO’s Our Flag Means Death

Of course, the acting on HBO Max’s Our Flag Means Death is phenomenal, but the real credit goes to the writers. Creator/writer David Jenkins, who wrote People of Earth for TBS, is joined by William Meny (What We Do In The Shadows, High Maintenance) as well as a handful of up-and-coming writers.

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The diverse crew aboard The Revenge is a lot of fun to follow, even though they are all lucky that they’re still alive. And, as they barely skirt death every episode, each has some funny quotable comments along the way.

The Crew Discuss Mutiny

“If We Can Light Him On Fire, I’m In!”


Wee John sitting on deck of The Revenge on Our Flag Means Death

In the very first episode, the crew of The Revenge makes it quite clear that they don’t like their captain; he’s too nice and too friendly and doesn’t let them pillage or plunder nearly enough. So Black Pete brings up the idea of ‚Äč‚Äčkilling Captain Bonnet.

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Nearly all of the crew are behind Black Pete, and they discuss the best way to kill Bonnet when Wee John chimes in with the quote. It’ll become a running gag as the show progresses and give Kristian Nairn, the actor who also played Hodor in game of Throneswhere many have likely seen the actor, a few hilarious moments.

The Crew Try To Understand Vacation

“Can My Vacation Be Torturing Hostages?”


Stede Pushing The Revenge on Our Flag Means Death

This crew is so lazy and the captain so flaky that they only realize nobody was navigating until they run ashore. This mishap gives everybody some time to relax, but none of them have ever heard of ‘vacation.’ Hence Roach’s sincere question to the captain.

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So while each crew member tries their hand at recreation — blowing things up, bathing, and wandering off — Captain Bonnet tries to singlehandedly push The Revenge back out to sea. Once again, their mishaps lead to some of the funniest bits in this episode.

Jim Gets Caught

“Look! I’m Incredible At Keeping Secrets! My Mom Thought I Liked Girls For Years!”


Jim and Oluwande below deck on The Revenge in Our Flag Means Death

It’s revealed early on that the character of Jim is actually a woman disguised as a man, wearing a fake beard and wax nose and pretending to have muteness. Only Oluwande knows the truth. It’s not until Jim (played by Vico Ortiz) goes for a swim while trying out vacation that Lucius discovers the pirate’s outfit lying on the beach and blurts this quote.


Lucius coming out to save his hide makes for a delightful moment between the two. However, Jim doesn’t care what Lucius says and wants to kill him anyway. Fortunately, the scribe survives.

Selling A Hostage In The Republic Of Pirates

“Man For Sale! Man For Sale! Someone Buy My Booty!”


Captain Stede Bonnet swing his arms around on Our Flag Means Death

After taking hostages from Captain Badminton’s crew and losing one, Stede decides to head to the scariest place possible — The Republic of Pirates — where he figures he’ll sell off the hostage. Clueless to the danger, well, clueless to most things, Stede wanders down the dangerous streets calling out that quote, completely unaware of its meaning.

This line is excellently done partly because of Rhys Darby’s performance as Stede. Just like the characters in What We Do In The Shadowsone of Taika Waititi’s best movies, Stede overconfidently bumbles through life, unaware of the potential consequences.


Stede Orders Drinks

“It’s Juice From The Nose Jar.”


Spanish Jackie holds a knife to Stede's nose on Our Flag Means Death

Stede and Lucius wander into Spanish Jackie’s bar and order wine from the bartender, Geraldo (played by Fred Armisen, who plays many iconic SNL characters). Unfortunately, they’re out of wine and have to select a beverage from one of the mysterious floating containers with what appear to be body parts. Stede confidently selects the least innocuous-looking jar, and Geraldo pours them two.

After both drink deeply, Stede asks what it is, and Geraldo answers with the quote. He explains that Jackie (played by Leslie Jones) likes to cut the noses off people and save them as souvenirs. Who would have thought they were drinking nose juice? Of course, the noses will come back around to haunt Stede.


The Captain Gets Stabbed

“Did You Mean To Do That?”


Stede Bonnet peeking over the edge of a ship on Our Flag Means Death

Geraldo convinces Stede to sell a hostage to the Spanish navy, so Stede has Roach make tapas to bring to the ship. But Geraldo has double crossed them. And, as they board the vessel, the crew begins to realize it’s a trap. ‘The Gentleman Pirate’ (as Stede is now calling himself) admires how sturdy the Spanish ladder is as he climbs aboard.

The last thing he is expecting is to get stabbed by the person who greets him. It takes him a beat to even realize what’s happening, with his men from him being held at swordpoint before he utters this quote. Stede is sure that the naval officer must have made a mistake. But most of what is happening to poor Stede is very confusing to him as of late.

The Crew Discusses Why Women Aren’t Allowed On Ships

“Because Women Have Crystals In Their Body, And The Crystals Attract Demons, And The Demons Attract Misfortune.”


The Crew on the deck of The Revenge On Our Flag Means Death

After poor Stede gets stabbed, Geraldo removes Jim’s (wax) nose and says Jackie wants it for the nose jar. Then, he removes Jim’s beard, all to the horror of the clueless crew who think Jim’s being tortured. Now the cat’s out of the bag for everyone, and people are confused.

Once safely back on The Revenge, the crew discusses the fact that Jim is actually a woman and realizes that it’s bad luck for a female to be on a ship. Jim disagrees and says she’s been on the ship all this time. It’s a brilliant scene, and the guys are hilariously ignorant. But Frenchie speaks up and man-splains ‘science’ to Jim.


A Pirate Tries To Learn Manners

“Skin Him First. And Use The Snail Fork.”


Blackbeard Looking behind him On Our Flag Means Death

Poor Blackbeard seems to be going through a tough time. He’s also a bit unpredictable, but he’s befriended Stede, ‘The Gentleman Pirate.’ And Blackbeard wants to learn the ways of the wealthy. After taking over a French vessel, Stede sits Blackbeard down at their table and attempts to explain the use of all the utensils, like an escargot fork.

The French captain who’s tied up calls Blackbeard a donkey, and, not surprisingly, he shows his true color by telling Fang to throw the man overboard, then amends his order with this quote. He’s always a brute at heart. It’s a very amusing scene watching Taika Waititi’s violent pirate feign stabbing with that snail fork, showing that not only is the actor one of the best directors in comic book movie history, but he is also an amazing comedic talent.

Blackbeard Regales The Party With Stories

“Jeff, Are You Saying You’ve Tasted Human Flesh?”


Gabriel and Party Laughing At Blackbeard on Our Flag Means Death

Eventually, Blackbeard gets to interact with the aristocratic society and imagines joining. While Frenchie and Oluwande brilliantly conduct the very first pyramid scheme ever, Stede guides Blackbeard through the treacherous social landscape. To Stede’s surprise, Blackbeard enjoys telling the rich stories of his adventures about him.

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Kristen Schaal and Nick Kroll play Antoinette and Gabriel, the hosts of the party. Their horrible French accents are counterbalanced by their priceless performances. Antoinette gasps at Blackbeard’s story with this quote before the room begins to turn against the unsuspecting pirate.

The Captain Must Die

“It’s Time, Edward. Send Him To Doggy Heaven.”


Izzy & Blackbeard On Board The Revenge Talking on Our Flag Means Death

Blackbeard’s second in command, Izzy Hands, played by Con O’Neill (The Batman, Chernobyl), you have hated Stede Bonnet from the moment they met. Izzy’s one goal is to make sure his boss follows the pirate ways, and he begins to hate Stede even more when Blackbeard bonds with the man. Hands begins to plot Stede’s demise, whispering in Blackbeard’s ear.

It seems that Izzy and Blackbeard have known each other for a long time since Hands refers to his boss as Edward. But the way he convinces Edward to kill his new friend is by comparing the ignorant captain to a dog worth putting out of his misery so Blackbeard can get back to his routine life of pillaging and plundering. Fortunately, Stede’s blissful ignorance once again saves the day.


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