I dated a man for over 7 years before introducing him to my parents, and then we broke up | tracey folly

*This is a work of nonfiction based on actual events I experienced firsthand; used with permission.

We met at work.

He was well-dressed and handsome, with an expensive smile. He asked me on a date, and that was a problem because I was already dating someone else.

The man wore me down.

I thought about it and decided that I would go on the date and break up with my existing guy afterward, depending on how things went. FYI: I wouldn’t recommend this method of dating. The date went well, and I ended up going on more dates with the new guy.

I broke up with my boyfriend, whom my parents loved, to date the “new guy,” whom my parents hated sight unseen. It was a problem in my family for years, a problem that was exacerbated by the fact that I lived with my parents.

“Don’t bring him to this house,” they said, and I obeyed for over seven years.

After we crossed the seven-year mark, I sat my parents down and explained that I thought it was time for them to meet my boyfriend. Seven years is a long time to date without meeting the parents.

I had met his parents in the very beginning, and they couldn’t stand me. That was okay. The feeling was more than mutual.

I was afraid to introduce him to my parents because I knew they would disapprove. I was also ashamed of him because he wasn’t the quality man they wanted for me.

But I loved him, in a way.

I thought he was my everything, and I didn’t want to lose him.

Eventually, I did lose him.

And it was the best thing that ever happened to me.

I could see, after we broke up, that he wasn’t good for me. He was controlling and manipulative, and he made me feel like I was less than I was.

I was better off without him.

My parents were right about him all along, even though they had never even met him until three months before I ended things with him for good.

If I could go back and do it again, I would have listened to my parents from the beginning. They were only trying to look out for me, and they saw something in the situation that I was blind to.

Don’t make the same mistake I did. Trust your gut, and listen to your loved ones when they give you advice. It might just save you a lot of heartache in the long run.

If you’re in a long-term relationship and you haven’t introduced your partner to your parents yet, ask yourself why.

Are you ashamed of them? Are you afraid of their reaction?

You might be surprised by how much your parents actually like your partner once they finally meet them even if that wasn’t what happened to me.

And if you’re not happy with your partner, maybe it’s time to rethink the relationship. Just because you’ve been together for a long time doesn’t mean you have to stay together.

If it’s not working, let it go. You’ll be better off in the long run. I know I was.

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